lilacandladybugs:

Things Technoblade did/said in the Potato Wars:

  1. “But I wasn’t farming potatoes for profit, I was farming them for honor, for glory.”
  2. Potato War 1: “But what could I do? Farm potatoes by hand?” Literally the first sentence of Potato War 2 “So I was farming potatoes by hand-”
  3. Technoblade trying to figure out how to defeat his enemies and his first two thoughts are Research and then Sabotage
  4. He knew that the cost of finishing the potato wars instead of collaborating with Dream was hitting his next milestone (3 mil) and he still did it
  5. He sold like all of this special items just so that he could sell them to buy fucking potato minions
  6. “Whitelisted wha  do you want fro  me” 
  7. He single handedly crashed the market price for potatoes
  8. Bought an alt to infiltrate squid-kid’s anti-Technoblade guild
  9. Named the alt “potato” in french
  10. He says that he joined smp earth to throw off squid kid. Is this a joke? Does anyone know?? Like he would do that but also what the fuck?
  11. Figured out that he could use his skeleton horse pet to trample squid kid’s crops but didn’t because he’s a good person it was inefficient 
  12. Had over 5x as much productivity farming potatoes by hand as squid kid.
  13. Not because squid is lazy, just bc Technoblade is a legend
  14. Ah yes, the stages of escalation in the Potato War:
    1. Research
    2. Sabotage 
    3. Espionage
    4. Psychological warfare
    5. Propaganda
    6. Torture
    7. Grief
  15. Psychological warfare is allowed but bullying is NOT if you say something mean about squid-kid Technoblade will personally show up in your closet at night like a sleep paralysis demon
  16. The amount of math and genuine usage of the scientific method in minecraft shouldnt be allowed
  17. HE IS BUT A PUPPET, AND I THE PUPPETEER
  18. death note who
  19. people thought technoblade was botting bc he was that dedicated
  20. All I’m saying is that if you are a new Technoblade fan and you haven’t seen the Potato Wars you’re missing out on an incredibly important part of his channel and you should liveblog it because i want to laugh at your reactions

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Tags: technoblade mcyt