hey siri how do i explain to tumblr that ‘bury your gays’ is about more than the texual death of queer characters and that the textual death of queer characters is not, therefore, always a bad thing
Hey Siri, how do I explain to people that killing off characters for ‘drama’ is lazy and ham-fisted writing *at best*–and that doing it to characters from marginalized groups contributes to a legacy of underrepresentation, negative representation, and bigotry that actively harms communities and is, in fact, always a bad thing?
Literally the only reason things happen in fiction is “for drama”. Like… that’s what a narrative is. Drama. The problem is when it’s done for cheap drama.
“Bury your gays” means that gay characters are treated, narratively, as more expendable than others. Their lives/stories are treated as having less potential, without the possibility of a happily-ever-after.
But like… the way to fight this trope is not to decree as a community that narratives about or featuring death are inherently homophobic. Tragedies are not unethical–they just should not be the only OR the majority of stories being told about LGBTQ and other marginalized characters. You can, like, not personally want to read tragedies, and that’s fair! But a blanket ban against character death and anyone who writes it does not actually increase the number of happy stories and is a major “fuck you” to every marginalized writer who wants to write things that are meaningful to them.
LGBTQ characters should die, but in ways and rates comparable to straight characters.
Therapists aren’t people who you “pay to pretend to care about you”, therapists are people you pay to teach you how to care for yourself
Me: I am violently depressed.
Therapist: Oh! Sounds like you need to do YOGA! That will help!
Me: *signs up for yoga*
Me: *is violently depressed in Downward Dog*
Me: I hate myself and only see my flaws
Therapist: ok lets refocus on things you like about yourself. This week i want you to try and journal about good things you’ve for yourself and others.
Me: *does the homework* yeah but i still hate myself but feel bad cause i shouldn’t
Therapist: feeling like you shouldn’t hate yourself is a step in the right direction. Mental health is complex and isn’t something that will ~magically~ improve. We have a lot of hard work head of us but I’ll be here to help you.
TL;DR stop perpetuating the idea that therapy is unhelpful because the results are not instantaneous.
FUCKING THIS.
As a psychologist the amount of bullshit on this site, the amount of fucking dangerous bullshit on this site about how therapy is neurotypical bullshit and isn’t worth it and how exercise is pointless and good diet is pointless and that therapy homework is pointless DRIVES ME UP THE FUCKING WALL
Exercise is fucking important. good diet is fucking important therapy is fucking important. WHY???
because pills alone don’t help. they improve the hormonal imbalance (as does exercise and good diet which ALSO are a form of very real self care as your physical being is sorta connected to your mental one but go fucking figure right?), but guess what? the suicidal thoughts, the thoughts of harm, the thoughts of hating yourself, they’re still there. suicides actually increase when medicated. why? because suddenly you have the energy to fulfill thoughts of harming yourself. which is why you NEED therapy alongside pills.
it has taken you years, or decades to create your maladaptive thought processes and behaviours. that shit doesn’t disappear overnight. core beliefs don’t change overnight. these are the very fucking core of your personhood, your being and personality. THAT TAKES TIME TO CHANGE
STOP ACTING LIKE THERAPY IS SHIT IF IT DOESNT WORK IN TWO SESSIONS
^This!!!!!
The stigma that therapy isn’t worth it if you don’t feel better after the first couple sessions is such bullshit. It took me 8 months to tell my therapist anything personal but I kept going because I wanted to get better. I thought it was bs too when she kept telling me to think about other things and to distract myself when I have intrusive thoughts (not exact words whatsoever). Now it’s 2 and a half years later and I can successfully switch from thinking about all the ways I could kill myself to the song Slippery by Migos and immediately start laughing. You need to let it help you.
Something important to think about too is that there are DIFFERENT KINDS OF THERAPY and DIFFERENT KINDS OF THERAPISTS and sometimes it won’t work for you because it’s the wrong sort. Just like taking antibiotics for depression won’t really do shit for you generally, the wrong kind of therapy can do no good, or even more harm than good. Talk to your therapist about what kinds of therapy they practice, and find one that’s right for you.
And btw, there are bad therapists out there. If you get a therapist who doesn’t listen to you and insists Yoga will cure everything, like the post a couple above, (and yoga doesn’t work for you, I guess it works for some), you can and should get a new therapist!
Same way you don’t walk into a restaurant, see the menu is entirely full of foods you hate and have aversions to and say “I guess it’s this or starving”, you can find a new restaurant.
This is especially important if you live in areas where who can be a therapist is not super accredited and people can just set up and say they’re good at it. There are bad therapists out there, for sure. But you can leave them and find better.
If y’all have ever shared memes n stuff about being a Weird Little Girl, I hope that includes support of autistic girls with “cringy” special interests, and loud, ‘annoying’ girls with adhd, and neurodivergent girls with ‘weird’ stims and who are socially awkward, because those girls are awesome and being a Weird Little Girl isn’t just about playing in the mud and having complex plotlines for your pretend games
Me: *sees weird little girl post that talks about making potions from backyard plants, and remembers that I did that*
Me: Ah!
Me: *remembers that I also meowed at people and had a period of like 2 years where Lewis and Clark was the only subject I ever talked about*
Me: Hmm…
Weird little girls and also weird kids in middle school and high school, who still wear cat ears at 16 and exclusively talk about the structural color of chameleons for too long
I aspire to one day wholeheartedly reject cringe culture
Also hey does anyone wanna hear about how chameleons change color??
Tell us about the chameleons 👀
Hi, yes, I am here for the chameleon colours please
Ok so chameleons are REALLY weird - if you zoom in on their skin, they don’t actually have any color, instead they have a grid of little reflector cells, spaced ~500 nm apart, like this:
When light comes in that has the same wavelength as that spacing (in this case blue light, with a wavelength of 500 nm), it bounces off these reflector cells at exactly the right distance to line up with all the other blue light coming in. This line-up is called constructive interference, and it means that we see this blue light very intensely!
All the other colors, however, with different wavelengths, don’t line up nicely and just end up mucking each other up (this is destructive interference), and so we don’t see these colors bouncing off the chameleon at all.
Because the chameleon is bouncing back blue light intensely and nothing else, it looks blue to us, even though it really isn’t.
But then the thing that blows my mind: When a chameleon wants to change color, it just… stretches its skin out? Kind of like flexing a muscle? And that changes the spacing of those little reflector cells, to maybe 700 nm apart. At this new distance, the blue light doesn’t line up nicely any more and gets mucked up, but red light (wavelength 700 nm) lines up perfectly, and suddenly the chameleons looks red to us.
Like??? Imagine you’re angry at someone so you flex all your muscles as hard as you can and turn a WHOLE NEW COLOR in the process. What the FUCK!!
Anyway blue eyes in humans work the same way, you don’t have any blue pigment in there, there are just reflectors spaced apart to reflect blue light!
This hurts my brain, but in a good way.
I’d just like to say that I have tutored science for 20 years, and I have never seen Constructive Interference of Waveforms described or illustrated so well as these diagrams
Shout out to weird little girls of all types, and also every damn chameleon!
Now excuse me while I try to figure out how to get someone with chameleon skin into my WIP.
Dragonborn: You like to be the center of attention and you have a knack for dramatic flair— Or you just really like lizards.
Dwarf: You’re short and you have a lot of pent up anger about it. You’re also the kind of person who adheres to the ten second rule when food hits the ground.
Elf: You’re maybe a little bit pretentious but mainly you like the idea of fucking off to the woods and never having to deal with idiots again. Also you are probably gay.
Gnome: You are the manic pixie dream girl and/or you are a bastard without limits. You might have picked the class as a joke but now you would never pick anything else.
Half-Elf: You’re a really friendly person but you’re too shy to initiate conversation so you just let people come to you first and then someone mentions one (1) thing you’re into and you implode.
Halfling: You really are just Motherfucker Unlimited, huh? You like to cause chaos and you will probably kill at least one NPC unprompted.
Half-Orc: Either you are a woman and you are a lesbian or you are a man and you drink your respect women juice either way you have a thing for big arms.
Goliath: Your favorite character in any movie, show, or book, is the gentle giant. You are desperate for love and affection from your friends but too shy to admit it.
Genasi: Kind of depends on the element, but generally you either are an extrovert or would be if you had just a little more self confidence.
Aasimar: You either play this character straight and you are a perfect cinnamon roll or you play the “fallen angel” and you are an absolute edgelord, no in between.
Aarakocra: You are either a furry or you just can’t stand the idea of someone having the same character as you so you picked the one you’ve never heard of before. Also flight. The fact you can fly was a big deal.
Human: You like to keep your options open and you don’t like the idea of anything being handed to you. You’re a hard worker but also you have commitment issues.
Goblin: You are a goblin.
Tiefling: you had to hide in the closet for years, and by God you want to be as flamboyant and seen as possible now.
Found a dozen eggs in the middle of the woods. Still cold even though it’s a hundred degrees outside. Is this a faerie trick?
My coworkers to me this morning: Oh, glad to see you’re still alive!
Me: After getting stung by wasps?
Them: No, after eating Bush Eggs.
excuse me tumblr user Draconym? you belong to the Fae now
I didn’t eat all twelve eggs because I gave one to my bird; surely that should protect me at least somewhat from being bound by the Fairy Queen?
Everyone’s supportive when life gives you lemons but then as soon as the forest starts handing out eggs everybody’s a critic
I laughed so hard at this. The Fae are probably just standing there with their mouths open and the sheer and beautiful audacity of you feeding their ‘gift’ failed trap to your beautiful birb.
i’d say that since op only ate 11/12 they belong to the fae 11 months of the year, the other month is when they get op’s bird
Don't give up. Unless you have to for a little while. Then don't panic. CONTAINS: Star Trek, Dungeons and Dragons, Critical Role, History, Current Affairs, Space, Cats, and Etc. Adult.
